One of my kids who has been struggling adjusting back to school came to me one evening asking me for things to make him happy. “Mom, I like this food and it makes me happy. Can I have some so I can be happy?” He said it so bluntly and honestly. He wanted something to fill him to make him happy. We often use superficial “feel goods” to help us ease something that doesn’t feel so good, something that is hurting, wounded, weary, worn out….
A commercial pops up: pumpkin spice and everything nice… and just like that my brain is telling me I need a coffee! A nice pumpkin spice coffee! And maybe a muffin too… I don’t really need it, but it sounds good and I would feel good having it… I am no different than my son. I just don’t say it as bluntly as he does.
Jesus tells us to come to Him… to bring to Him our weary hearts, our broken hearts, our wounds, and our exhausted worn-out selves (Matthew 11:28-30). Jesus tells us to come to Him, but He doesn’t stop there. He tells us to come to Him and He will give us rest. Rest. What a wonderful word. I just have to go to Him and trust Him with my heart, with my broken, with my hurting, with my wounds, with all of it. But I strive to make it better, to make it feel better. Maybe some of you do, too. My son’s voice echoes in my head asking for something to help him feel good and happy…Maybe at the heart of my striving is that I forget to trust. I forget to take it to Jesus and trust. I keep picking it back up and then trying to make myself feel better with superficial feel goods. In a recent sermon, it was highlighted that Satan’s goal is not to disprove God but to show Him as not trustable…
In a recent Bible study, it was pointed out by one of the other women that physical blessing can be taken away, but spiritual blessings have a fixed place in eternity. I have been going to church for many years but never heard it put quite like that. My son and I, in our own unique ways, have both reflected, trying to fill our needs and feel better with earthly physical blessings… Not that physical blessings are bad, but they have a different impact than the spiritual. How much different life could be if I chose to trust God and lean into Jesus with all my weariness and hurts from this crazy tough world. Leaning into Jesus, trusting him with my mundane hard and reaping a spiritual blessing that is fixed and can’t be taken away. In some ways, for me it is easier to trust with something bigger and more obvious but a little less easy to trust with the simpleness of being tired and worn out.
It feels incomplete to leave this without highlighting one more truth… the truth that God is doing more than just being there waiting for us to renew us and give rest. In the same Bible study, going through Ephesians chapter 1, it highlights the abundance and lavishness of God’s grace. God doesn’t just show us grace. He shows us lavish and abundant grace! When I find myself remembering to trust Him with my everyday things, He is ready and waiting with lavish and abundant grace! And rest! He is there waiting with it for you, too!

Freedom.  This is a word that we Americans hold dearly.  We have fought for it and many have died for it.  But once in our nation’s history many were not aware of their freedom.  In 1865, the enslaved in Galveston, TX learned that they were indeed free.  We now celebrate Juneteenth in commemoration of this time.

According to an article in Good Housekeeping, “Abraham Lincoln had issued the Emancipation Proclamation on January 1, 1863, but it wasn’t until June of 1865 when Major General Gordon Granger and the Union troops landed in Galveston, TX  to tell the enslaved African-Americans living there that the Civil War had ended and that they were now free”.

Can you imagine their surprise? They had been enslaved for 246 years and it had actually been over 18 months prior? How could this be?  Envision if you will the relief and celebration that ensued after hearing such news. How unbelievable it is to us today that it took so long for these Texans to learn of this wonderful truth.

Such also are many in the church today.  We have been freed from the burden of our sins and set free by the blood of Christ but we don’t even know it yet.  

Oh yes we know Jesus died for our sins and made a way for us to go to Heaven but friends there is so much more to this!  We do not need to continue to be encumbered by our shame or guilt of the past.  

Yes, there is a place for such but once we have left those at the feet of our Savior we are free.  Only Satan would want us to continue to mull over past mistakes and failures.  Jeus has suffered for us already and he said Himself with His dying breath, “It is finished”.  He paid for our freedom with His life.

When Jesus died on that cross centuries ago, “there was a legal transference of the condemnation our sin deserved from us to him, and in the death of our Savior, all trace of anything that might otherwise be held against us is gone.”**

Now go and live like you are free.  Jesus did not give up His perfect, sacrificial life for us to wander around and think to ourselves, “I don’t know,  I’ve really messed up this time.”  “God might not forget about this.” Or “That doesn’t apply to me.  I’m not good enough for that.”  Let’s not forget Romans 3:23 “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”  or  what about Romans 3:10, “ There is no one righteous, not even one;” If we could be ‘good enough’ Jesus would not have needed to come to take our places.  

If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior, and asked for your sins to be forgiven, and received the Holy Spirit, then you are free indeed. Now go and walk in victory!  Share with others the good news of what you have received and what they too can have with  just a step of faith.

No one is too far gone.  God is not mad at you.  He wants everyone and anyone to come home, be a part of His family and receive His goodness.  Then you will be liberated to pursue God’s purposes and live the life of joy He intended; guilt and shame free.

 If the past tries to sneak up on you, remind yourself that what Jesus did for you stands forever.  Paid in Full!  Nothing anyone does can take that away!  (Romans 8:38,39) Hallelujah!  Thank you Jesus!  I am free! 

The slaves in 1865 may have doubted the good news that they were free but I’m sure they investigated the rumors immediately.  Is it true? 
Yes, my people, you are finally free.

John 8:32 “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
 
?”Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom”?


**Taken from “A Dozen Things God Did with Your Sin (and Three things He’ll Never Do) by Sam Storms

As our pastor has been working through Jesus’ journey to the cross, it has struck me how Jesus worked to prepare the disciples for the journey to come. They were a bit clueless. As Jesus sat at the table with them and shared about what was to come, they didn’t hear it or get it. They missed the point and ended up arguing. I feel like I can often relate to Peter and some of the situations that he ended up in because of how vocal he could be. I wonder what Peter felt after having betrayed Jesus, hearing the crow three times and realizing that he had done what he said he wouldn’t do…maybe at that point he could look back and hear the voice of Jesus explaining what was to come. He could hear and see that Jesus had been trying to tell them something important. That he hadn’t listened. I imagine one of the feelings he felt after all of this in addition to his grief was shame.

Shame… ugh… 

Most of us have probably been there. We have felt shame because of what we have done….or….we might have felt it because we perceived that others saw us a certain way, or someone tried to put the feelings of shame onto us.

This has been weighing on my heart recently.

Every time we feel shame it is as if we have hit a crossroad, and we have a choice what we do with it. If we feel shame and we allow it to, it can be an opportunity to draw us closer to God! Shame often isolates. It can be a tool of the enemy, or it can allow a closer and deeper relationship with God as we lean into Him and heal and grow. Yep, I think Peter had to heal and grow. 

I was talking with my older sister about the topic of shame as I struggled to process through some recent life events. She reminded me that no matter the sin, it is always first against God. This got me reading, and throughout the Bible are verses that talk about people confessing how they have sinned against God. The situations may or may not discuss the sin against others, but they do acknowledge the sin against God. It is so awesome how quick God is to forgive us! 

If the shame is coming from something I did, like Peter, then I have this amazing opportunity to turn to God, confess and draw close to Him knowing that there is sweet forgiveness. If the shame is coming from someone else trying to put it onto me, be it from the devil himself or someone else, then I can confidently know that it has no place and no hold on me. I can also know that their effort to shame me is a sin first against God and because of that I can let it go and leave it with God for Him to deal with. Either way, I can turn to God and draw close to Him and let the sense of shame go!

Thinking back to Peter and his healing… can you just imagine the joy, the freedom, and the peace that came with talking to Jesus after his resurrection?! What an amazing time that must have been. The gospels don’t talk much about what Jesus taught them or shared with them after His resurrection. But this must have been such a time of grace and restoration along with a calling to keep doing what Jesus has called them to. Healing comes with continuing to lean into God after a time of heartache and hardship. There is forgiveness and grace. But growth and healing come with continuing to lean into Jesus and following him rather than isolating. How amazing the time must have been after the resurrection! 

When I think of arriving in Heaven, many images come to mind.  Sometimes I think I just want to collapse at the feet of Jesus and get a big hug.  Others will say we won’t be able to speak at the sight of Him.  I was thinking today of a warrior princess.  She’s strong, like Wonder Woman.  She’s got her armor on and a shield with her.  She has cuts, nicks and bruises but she’s still fighting. She’s dirty from the places she’s had to go to finish her race.  I think of our walk in life like this, and this image is what I imagine when we finally come to the destination we’ve fought so hard to get to, to believe in, to not give up on.

Think about some of the trials in your own life.  When friends have betrayed you.  Maybe you worked so hard for a promotion and did the best job, but still the favorite was chosen over you.  People turn their backs on you for no reason.  Sickness can overtake us without warning.  Loved ones taken in the flash of an eye.  Unexpected sorrows of many kinds.  Unforeseen evils.  There are plenty of circumstances that are hurtful in life.  But it’s how we react and go on afterward that gives us our true merit.  

You see, I believe, our earned battle scars are actually earned when we come back from these circumstances and put on our Christ-likeness and decide to go on.  We don’t give up.  We push through.  We choose to keep believing that God is still good.  Jeremiah 29:11 is one of my favorite verses for all types of seasons.  “For I know the plans I have for you, plans for a hope and a future. Plans for good and not for evil.”  

More than likely you have heard a sermon about the armor of God (Ephesians 6:11-18).  The Bible is our sword.  Our faith is our shield.  The helmet is the Lord’s righteousness that covers our minds.  The belt of truth keeps us girded up.  The shoes of peace. Can you picture the warrior yet?  

Life is a constant battle.  Either circumstances or inner turmoil are always against us.  We fight day and night to stay on our path, to keep our faith in what we’ve learned and been taught from the scriptures. We fight the fiery darts from the evil one that are hurled at us as we traverse this life.  We have a target on our backs.  (Ephesians 6:16)

I imagine a great battle scene each day as I go.  Swinging at this dart of insult. “React in love!” Ha!  When something unplanned appears in the path, my helmet is fastened tighter, I draw my shield (“I know what God has told me, where I am headed”), my sword comes out reminding me what goes ahead of me.  Who does my actual fighting when I let Him?  
Zechariah 4:6 “Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord of hosts. “

These my friends are the reasons we need to be built up in our Spirits.  We have a real battle facing us daily.  Every decision is molding us to be ready for the next steps in our Heavenly walk.  When you get there you will bow and hear, “Well done good and faithful servant.” Keep fighting.  The battle is most certainly worth every moment. 

Romans 8:18 “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.”

I will forever be a paper planner person. Don’t try to convince me how easy a shared Google calendar is. Don’t try to wow me with the amazing things technology can do to manage my schedule or show me how much easier keeping track of events would be if I would just go digital. I won’t. I’m stubborn. 

There’s just something so fulfilling about opening up that planner to a blank January and beginning to fill it with all that the coming year will hold (in pencil only, of course). Many are significant and special events like birthdays, vacations and trips, sports games and church events. Others are the mundane meetings, appointments and schedules to keep. And then there are the celebrations that bring the happy sads; the senior nights, the graduations, the weddings and the goodbyes. But whether significant or mundane, each event holds room in my planner, room in my life and ultimately room in my heart. 

We make room for the things that are important to us. 

In Matthew 22, Jesus is asked which command of the law holds the greatest value above all. Jesus replies in verses 37 and 38: 

He said to him, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the greatest and most important command.”

The greatest and most important command from Jesus is to love God with all that you have. 

All your heart. 
All your soul. 
All your mind. 



In the midst of the schedules and meetings, the tasks and never ending to-do lists, the events that keep us busy and people that take up room in our hearts and in our lives, are we intentionally creating and preparing room to love Jesus with all of our heart, all of our soul, all of our mind? 

Or, if you’re like me, do you find that there are often too many times that we have put so much energy and effort into preparing room for everyone and everything else, that we give Jesus the leftovers of our heart, our soul and our mind? 

As we turn the page on a new year, a year that is already full with so many happenings, it takes intentionality to prepare to spend the year with Jesus. Just as we make preparations for the events that take up room in our lives. It takes preparation and being purposeful. It takes spiritual rhythms. It takes accountability friends. It takes saying no to other things fighting for our time to ensure that we are truly loving our Savior with ALL that we have and all that we are. 

Loving Jesus with all of our heart means having a heart set on loving and praising Him first and foremost. Loving Jesus with all our soul means spending time with him constantly in prayer and in quiet. Loving Jesus with all our mind means being intentional about spending time daily filling our minds with His word so that His word is hidden within our hearts. 

As we approach all that 2025 has to hold, let every heart prepare Him room.

How Precious are His Thoughts Towards Us

I have many favorite books of the Bible, and one of them is definitely Psalms.  I have nicknamed Psalms as “ChapStick for the soul”.  It soothes where needed and pours in nourishment on my cracked and weary soul.  Psalm 139 stands out on my long list of beloved scriptures.

The Lord understands and knows our thoughts (vs 3), and He knows the words before they are on my tongue (vs 4) still unspoken.  

Check out verse 5.  It says, “You have encircled me behind and before.  And laid your right hand upon me.”  I love that illustration.  Of support.  Of tenderness.  Of protection.  Just like a loving Father. 

When we read verse 16 we see the Lord saw us before we were even formed, and He even had written all our days.  This is remarkable and shows us so much love.  To think God wrote out our lives and knows it all (our shortcomings, our mistakes, our sinful decisions) and still wants us is amazing!  I’m filled with love at this knowledge.  It is beautiful.

Go to verse 17.  It  says, “God, how precious your thoughts are to me; how vast their sum is!” In Webster’s Dictionary precious is defined as “of great value; cherished”.  Verse 18: “If I should count your precious thoughts of me, they would be more in number than the sand.”

Many believe God is watching and judging.  Marking mistakes.  But the Bible paints a different picture.  He shows us here that He thinks we are special.  He knows us and all of our flaws and still hedges us in and puts His hand on us.  We are His!

I can’t let the devil convince me that God is mad.  If I think of a sin or place I need to grow, I need to bring it to the light of confession.  And let God help me deal with it.  So often, I am convinced that my offenses and shortcomings are more evidence that I’m not making the cut; God isn’t happy.  But in the hands of the Holy Spirit, my faults can become purified, and I can grow through them.

This Psalm ends with “search me, O God, and know my heart, try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

The Lord already knows us all the way through.  As stated above, He knows where we are going and where we’ve been.  Even what we are thinking and what we will say before we say it.  

Thank you Father for the work you’ve already done on the cross and You intend to do in me.  Remind me that I am only a human, and You know me fully.  I can trust You.  Lead me as you change me and as I grow into Your glory.  Help me to remember to willingly surrender to you - 
my ugly stuff and my hurts, my frustrations and my doubts.  You are my King!  Let me be living as if it is so.  Amen!

The other day I was sitting with my mom when out of the blue she said, “You know, when you were little, children were to be seen and not heard. Many parents didn’t carry on conversations with their children as they do now.”  At that moment, I knew my mother was apologizing for never talking with or showing affection to my sister and me while we were growing up, especially when we were young.

I don’t have a lot of memories of my growing up years; what I do remember having are a lot of questions and emotions and not knowing what to do with them. My father was a hard worker, but he struggled with a low frustration level and lots of loud, angry outbursts, mainly towards me.  As a result, I struggled with big emotions and people-pleasing behaviors as a child, alternating between anger and extreme sadness. Not knowing what to do with these big emotions, and trying my hardest not to anger my father, I learned how to stuff them inside, only for them to come out in passive-aggressive ways for many years.
I tried to pray to God but felt I wasn’t allowed to be truly honest with Him; I felt I had to be grateful in my prayers and be a good example in my life, but in private, I was still teetering between great anger and sadness.  

Hebrews 4:14-16 states, ”Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and grace to help us in our time of need.”

God designed our emotions to connect us to Him, each other, and ourselves. One of the reasons Jesus came to earth was so that He could experience human emotions. The Bible provides examples of Jesus experiencing many emotions: happiness, sadness, empathy, anger, and even fear in the Garden of Gethsemane.  Isaiah 53:3 states, “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of suffering who knew what sickness was. He was like someone people turned away from; he was despised, and we didn’t value him.”
 
Nowhere in the Bible does it state that we can’t approach God in our prayers with the true depth and breadth of our emotions.  I had to learn that it was okay to let God know when I felt sadness and even when I felt anger—sometimes towards Him!  He can handle it!  Jesus wants our hearts—the whole thing, messy imperfections and all.  Almost every one of David’s psalms start out with David talking honestly with God about his emotions—and ending with praise towards God because David knew he had expressed them to the One who could heal him and show him how to teach others from what he learned.
I pray that we all find the trust to hand over our overwhelming emotions to Jesus and, when advisable, share them in the safety of sweet friends who love and won’t judge our feelings.
John 15:11 states, “I have told you these things so that my joy may be in you and your joy may be complete.”

In recent months, we have heard from pastor Todd and others on a number of Sunday mornings about pain and suffering. The sermon series that Todd did was great, and you should listen to it if you haven’t already. Also, at the end of June, I was able to go on a women’s retreat. The theme of that retreat was ‘nothing wasted.’ Nothing wasted… not even pain and suffering, nor the complicated grief experienced in this life. We have also heard about how going through pain and suffering can feel more tolerable if we know that there is a purpose for it… Nothing wasted.

Pain hurts. Suffering is unpleasant, to say the least. Grief… Well, that can leave you feeling like there is no hope and like the sun will never shine again…
 
Yet, God says, “Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” (ESV, Isaiah 43:19).

God is in the business of making a way where there is no way. Like when Moses struck the rock and water flowed out. God made a river in the desert using a rock. Water is life giving. He used a hardened rock to give life. I bet none of those Israelites saw that coming. God is in the business of making a way where there seems to be no way. Hope.
God is in the details of life. The small, seemingly insignificant details of life. Wildernesses can be hard places to be. Deserts, those can be hard too. Yet, God is in the details; He is in the business of making a way.

This past spring was tough, and I didn’t get to plant as much as I would usually plant. I love flowers. That statement just doesn’t convey the feeling adequately. I LOVE flowers! I didn’t get to plant any flowers this past spring, specifically the zinnias that I always plant. They are annuals in our area and have to be replanted every year once the danger of the last frost has passed. Well, God planted them for me. That is the only reason for me finding a group of three small zinnia plants growing in my garden in June.
 
Fast forward to the later part of July. Life was particularly painful one morning, full of hurt and grief that left me gasping and grasping. My beautiful daughter called for me to look at something. She had stopped to look at the zinnias that God had grown. There on this lovely little plant grown from seed by my God, was a pretty little flower with a lovely heart shaped center. Now these flowers don’t usually have a heart shape. They are usually round circles, concentric circles. God grew for me a heart shaped zinnia flower that bloomed in that shape that particular morning when the pain felt like it might overwhelm. There it was. A flower just for me. It didn’t take away the pain, but it did remind me that God was in control. He is very much involved in the details of life. He loves each one of us so very much. 
He will make a way in the wilderness. Hope.

God will never force the door open. He knocks and lets us know that He is always there, but He leaves it up to us to choose Him and to choose to open the door to Him. He is in the details gently coaxing me towards Him and encouraging me to choose to do life according to His will and His way.
 
I love feeling the presence of my God. It brings a peace that passes all understanding. It brings comfort that eases the pains of this life. What is it about His presence that really impacts me? His love. God’s love covers a multitude of sins, my sins. Hope. It covers other people’s sins. Nothing wasted. Hope.

God’s love was reflected in that little flower with its heart shaped center.
I may not understand the ‘why’ behind the pain and suffering, but I do know that God is in control and that He is in the details, even to the point of doing the new thing of growing a lovely little flower that bloomed with its heart shape on just the day that I needed to be reminded. God is in the details. God will make a way. God is doing a new thing. Hope. There is always hope with God. There will still be pain, but there will be hope. Beautiful and full of peace.

“Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” (ESV, Isaiah 43:19).

Fear is a liar- part 2 

A few months ago, we considered some stories from Genesis and how Adam and Eve - as well as Cain - believed certain lies that led them to make wrong decisions out of fear. One more quick look at the Cain and Abel story - a few lines that we read but didn’t talk about from

Genesis 4:6-7..
Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”

‘Sin is crouching at your door… You must Rule over it’.. The word ‘rule’ here is the same word for “to reign, or to have dominion over”. Where have we seen that phrase before? With Adam in the garden, right? Adam was allowed to name the animals, and he (and we) were given dominion over them. And then we said that sometimes we become fearful - we believe a lie from the enemy and our behavior towards our brothers and sisters (who, by the way, were also created in God’s image) becomes… animal-like instead of Christ-like.

Remember, this is BEFORE Cain killed Abel. Cain had believed whatever lie the enemy had told him (“You’re not good enough, Abel made you look bad,” whatever it was), and God saw it (of course he saw it - He’s God, right?). So, before Cain killed Abel, God spoke directly to him - he took Cain’s thoughts and told him to consider them - and to consider his response to the emotions he was feeling. To consider his response to the lie he was being told… He is saying, “I have given you a way out, an opportunity to rule over this lie, to have dominion over what the enemy is trying to do.” He was telling Cain to take his thoughts captive before they take him captive, right?  

But Cain had to choose. And so do we. So as we close out our conversation on fear, what can we use to help take our thoughts captive - to counteract the lies of the enemy? Obviously, scripture, right? But specifically, consider:  

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears punishment has not been perfected in love.

‘Perfect Love casts out fear…’

So, what are we afraid of? 

Being alone? God is there. 

Being found out and punished? Jesus died on the cross for that - He already took the punishment for our sin.  

Not giving good enough gifts? Jesus was the perfect sacrifice, once and for all. 

Fear of missing out? Jesus died so we can live as part of the Kingdom now, and spend eternity with Him. We’re missing nothing. 

Fear of God holding out on you? He gave you His Son, and He has given us the keys to the kingdom - not just for later, but here and now - He gives us His Spirit to live within us. Jesus said that those of us who drink the water that He gives - from them will overflow springs of living water. The kingdom is here and now - we’re living in it… unless we’re allowing lies and fear to hinder it. 

So, as events come up that steal your rest and joy - circumstances, hard days, difficult conversations, other worries and fears, remember - perfect love casts out fear - so be intentional about getting back into your time with God, your time with community, and face whatever the issue is head-on, because you, for your entire life up to this point, and for the rest of your life - you have been - and will continue to be -  loved PERFECTLY. Anything that tells you differently… is a lie.

Jesus called his disciples to him and said, “I have compassion for these people; they have already been with me three days and have nothing to eat. I do not want to send them away hungry, or they may collapse on the way.”

 His disciples answered, “Where could we get enough bread in this remote place to feed such a crowd?”

“How many loaves do you have?” Jesus asked.

“Seven,” they replied, “and a few small fish.”

 He told the crowd to sit down on the ground.  Then he took the seven loaves and the fish, and when he had given thanks, he broke them and gave them to the disciples, and they in turn to the people. They all ate and were satisfied. Afterward the disciples picked up seven basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. The number of those who ate was four thousand men, besides women and children.
Matthew 15:32-38

Thousands of people.
Seven loaves of bread and a few small fish. 
Seven baskets leftover. 
More than enough.

Have you ever thought about the faith and trust of those with the bread and fish? When asked to part with the little food they had brought for their family, what do you think went through their head? Do you think there was pause and hesitation? Do you think they were reluctant? Do you think they worried they didn’t have enough to give to make a difference? Or do you think that what they had seen and heard from Jesus was enough to believe that He would do something great with what little they had to offer?
 
Often, there are times that we can look at the very little we have to give Jesus and decide that it’s not enough for Jesus to use; we’re not enough for Jesus to use. Or the circumstance is just too big. And instead of trusting in the Jesus that multiples seven loaves of bread and a few small fish into more than enough, we doubt. We doubt that He could ever use what we have to offer. We doubt that we even have anything worth using. We doubt that he can really turn fishes and loaves into abundance. We know our sin, our shortcomings, our unworthiness. And so, we doubt that He can use our fishes and loaves because it simply doesn’t seem like enough to offer.

We’ll never know on this side of heaven what went through the minds of the crowd that day. Maybe they felt as though they didn’t have enough to give. Maybe they doubted too. But they trusted Jesus anyway. They trusted that the Jesus they saw work miracle after miracle would take what little they had and do more with it than they could ever understand. They had faith. They trusted. And they watched Jesus take their yes and multiply it in ways they never thought possible.
 
What would it look like for us to trust Jesus with the little we have to offer? To fully believe that He could do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine according to His power that is at work within us. (Ephesians 3:20) To believe that despite our flaws, despite our lack, despite our sin that He can take what we offer and multiply for His glory?
What could Jesus do with our fishes and loaves?

And he said, “Oh, my child let go. I know you’re uneasy, but I’m in control. I don’t need that much for Me to show. I’ll make the most of your fishes and loaves.”
Josiah Queen, Fishes and Loaves

As I was trying to figure out what to write about, God called me out yet again. I was trying to do this forty-forty challenge. It is forty miles with forty days of reading the book of Luke. It should be everyday but for me it isn't. I am about four days behind in writing and reading. I have really enjoyed this time because it was making me make time to be closer to God. As I was reading, there it was…

 Luke 10:41-42
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

What was happening during this time was Martha was getting distracted by the preparations that needed to be made. Mary was sitting at the Lord’s feet listening to him preach the good news.

God was speaking very clearly to me. I am Martha. The one who is distracted by life and all that I have to do. I have four girls, working a job, trying to get our old home ready to sell, and keep up with our new home. I worry, I clean, I prepare, and I run around like a crazy lady! I don't rest, I don't take time like I should for the Lord. I don’t get to sit at the Lord’s feet like Mary. The sad part is that I am choosing to let the tasks control my life instead of me taking moments with God. This is not who I want to be.

I want to be Mary. I want to be able to control my life enough to take moments of time out for God several times a day. Honestly, I need this in order to stay sane. I struggle on how and where to even start. I know that I need to work, take care of our four girls, get cleaning done, and all the extras that come my way.  In all of this, I need time alone to sit in silence with God. To sit at His feet and listen to all the good things that He is trying to tell me. This is going to be hard and a new challenge for me.

I have been successful at my Bible readings each year and there are days that still take control of my time, and I miss some. I know that I need God’s word everyday. I know that I need prayer everyday. I just want to be more like Mary and sit at His feet. To bask in His goodness. To reflect on all of our blessings. To talk to Him like He is my best friend. I want that closeness with Him. I want that time with Him more than I ever have.

For myself and hopefully others who are struggling with being full-on Martha, find time to sit with Jesus. We all have things that we can either hold off on or not do at all in order to make time for Our Lord and Savior. Don’t put Jesus off anymore. Make time for Him here on out. I will be praying for you and hopefully you can pray for me as well on this journey that I must take now.

Recently our Golden Retriever underwent surgery. Following his procedure, his vet recommended we keep him calm for 2 weeks while his incision healed. Anyone who owns Goldens knows that is asking a lot as Milo stays in hyperdrive from the time his eyes open until they close at night. To keep him still, I had to administer calming medication twice daily, which changed his personality entirely and left him staring at me all day with these sad, red eyes. Nothing seemed right about this situation, but I knew I had to do what the vet ordered so that Milo would return to his once vibrant self after his stitches were removed.

According to www.biblestudy.org, “God uses numbers [in the Bible] to reveal His design, plan, and will.”  For example, the number 40 appears 158 times in the King James Version.  The number 40 is thought to exemplify a period of trials and testing during which spiritual growth and transformation result.  

In the book of Genesis, it rained on earth for 40 days and nights. Moses murdered an Egyptian man and hid in the desert for 40 years. He would later hike to the top of Mount Sinai and spend 40 days and nights in God’s presence, twice. The Israelites wandered in the desert for 40 years. The giant Goliath goaded the Israelite army for 40 days. Jonah was sent to Nineveh for 40 days to warn them of their upcoming destruction if they did not repent. Elijah went 40 days without food or water on Mount Horeb. Jesus fasted and was tempted in the desert by Satan for 40 days following his baptism. After his death and resurrection, Jesus appeared to his disciples and others for 40 days.
 
What isn’t mentioned in numerical terms in the Bible, but is just as significant, is the number 41. After raining for forty days and nights, on day 41 the rain stopped.  God called Moses to help Him free the Israelites from their enslavement in Egypt during year 41. Moses spent forty days and nights with God on Mount Sinai, and on day 41, he descended the mountain with the Ten Commandments. The Israelites entered the promised land during year 41. David defeated Goliath on day 41. Nineveh chose to repent and return to God on day 41. On day 41, Elijah prayed and rain returned to Israel after a three-year drought. After tempting Jesus for forty days in the desert, on day 41 Satan fled. And after spending forty days with His disciples, Jesus ascended into heaven on day 41.

Personally, after wandering through my own desert and trials for forty years, it was in year 41 that my deepest prayer was answered and my son was born. No one particularly enjoys the trials and tribulations we encounter in life, but if we lean into the lessons we can learn during these times of testing, we can come out on the other end stronger than before.
Forty-one days after his surgery, Milo is now (literally) bouncing off the walls again, better than before. Friends, if you are starting to feel weary from your desert wandering, please don’t give up - 41 is coming.

“but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

As we transition into spring time, a common thing to do is spring cleaning…maybe not a favorite thing to do but a helpful thing. I think it is a good time to do some spiritual spring cleaning too.

A few years ago, a pastor was talking about how hearing from the Holy Spirit is a bit like water flowing through a pipe. It flows well when the pipe isn’t clogged up and not so well when the pipe gets full of gunk and build up. He challenged the listeners to work on cleaning out their pipes so that their communication and hearing weren’t blocked up. I can be a bit of a visual learner, and this example was helpful. 

This example came to mind a few weeks ago and has led to some heart reflections. One of the things that has been causing some pipe “build up” has been people who have been hurtful and down right mean. Unkind words, abandonment, betrayal, and lots of “you” statements meant to leave me feeling shame and guilt. All those moments and words are sticking to the inside of the pipe and gunking it up. 

Over the past year as our pastors, Todd and Stacey, have talked through different red letter teachings of Jesus, there have been a number of challenging ones. But none as challenging for me as the call of Jesus to love my enemies. Reflection has led to the realization that this particular issue leads to “pipe build up” and makes it harder for me to be in relationship with the Holy Spirit. Sometimes, we can’t just walk away from someone who is an enemy but rather we have to regularly interact with that person. And like leg days at the gym, this is the opportunity to regularly exercise the muscles of learning to love those who feel like my enemy. Spring cleaning and heart leg days... doesn’t sound very appealing… but is it necessary? For me it is. As I reflected on this, I realized that the call to love my enemies has highlighted an area of unbelief, too. 

What does the Bible say about love? That God is love. That abiding in God means that we are also abiding in love. That everyone is our neighbor and we are to love our enemies and our neighbors. And that living for Christ means that we will experience persecution. That the battles are not of this world but rather spiritual ones with forces that cannot be seen. God is love. But what ultimately has helped has been further reflection on 1 Corinthians 13 from the perspective of loving my ‘enemy’... 

1 Corinthians 13:1-8a says… 

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” (ESV)
Wow. Talk about a tough workout plan! God is love, and He never ends. And with God there is the ability to bear the unbearable, there is the grace to continue to run the race with endurance, and there is hope! Hope that passes all understanding. There is nothing about being a doormat or letting ourselves be walked all over. But loving my enemies looks like being patient, kind, not holding a list of their wrong doings, not being easily irritated and resentful, and by bearing with it and enduring. And most importantly it means believing. Believing in God, in His goodness, faithfulness, forgiveness and letting His light and love flow freely through that pipe into me and through me. 

So who is that enemy for you? Perhaps this is simply the person driving too slow in front of you.. Or your teen who is slamming doors and silently angry all the time… or your spouse? Or that coworker? 

Will you join me in doing a little spring cleaning and pipe unclogging? Will you reflect on who your enemies are and alongside me learn to love your enemy? Can we do leg day together? 

We can pray together to ask God to help us abide in His love and grow us in our abilities to set healthy boundaries and love our enemies. We can ask God to renew in us our faith and hope in His goodness and faithfulness. And to help us with our unbelief. 

Let's do the spring cleaning and leg days! Let’s do it with confidence that God will renew us, that He is faithful and good, and that His love never ends! I am moving forward with confidence because my hope isn’t in myself, but rather it is in God who is my strength and my hope.

But soon a fierce storm came up. High waves were breaking into the boat, and it began to fill with water. Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?” Matthew 4:37-3

Crashing waves.
Howling wind.
Blinding fog.
Deafening noise.
Unexpected fear.  
Chaos.

Life brings so much hard. Raging storms come unexpectedly. There are days that feel like just as you’ve survived one storm, another looms on the horizon. It may feel as though you're desperately trying to find your footing as the boat sways beneath you, gripping onto anything you can while the storm rages around you. You struggle to see what’s in front of you, to be aware of what’s coming next. The devastation. The loss. The hopelessness.

Or perhaps, you’re watching others face the storm from a distance, helpless.

And wearily we cry out, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?”

Where is our hope in the middle of a storm? How do we find peace amidst the chaos?

When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm. Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
Matthew 4:39-40

“Do you still have no faith?” Have you forgotten the One who created You? Have you forgotten the One who calms the storm? Have you forgotten the One who controls the waves?

The waves crash. The chaos ensues. The noise deafens. The fear paralyzes. Yet there is Jesus. His voice is all it takes to quiet the wind and to calm the waves.

He is my rescue from the wind and waves.
He is the One that brings clarity.
He is the quiet whisper of truth inside the noise.
He is the calm to all fear.
He speaks peace into the chaos.

He speaks and He calms the storms that rage. He controls the things I cannot. And although the storms will continue to rage, I will rest in the promise that Jesus will calm the storm.

Jesus, when the winds howl and the waves crash, I will trust you.
Jesus, when the rains fall, I will trust you.
Jesus when all hope seems lost, I will trust you.


“I will trust in Your intentions. Even through my question marks. So I don’t need to know the answers. Because I know the One who does. You’ve been God for a while, so the wisdom of time says You always know best. So whatever befalls, whatever You want, Your will is worth the test. When it’s “yes” or “no” or “wait,” I’m gonna praise you anyway.”
- Anyway by Benjamin William Hastings

Here we are going into the new year, 2024!! Life is sure flying by a lot faster than I could ever imagine. It is time for a new year and a new start on something in our lives. 

Lots of people make resolutions during the first of the year, but how many follow through 100%? It is easy to make resolutions about getting in better shape, finally starting a new career, setting family goals for the year, and so much more. The hard part is actually putting those things into actions and following through. My favorite verse comes to mind when I think of the new year. 

Hebrews 12:11
"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

Discipline is extremely hard. It can be painful to follow through on things when it is just easier to get back into our old habits. But what is that really doing to us? God has designed us to do and become better than we are right now. That is why I think you should have an accountability partner(s) for new goals in your life. Someone who has your best interests and can give you the tough love that might be needed. It is way too hard to try and accomplish big goals on our own, and I have lived through the temptations of breaking my goals. It was just easier to quit after some time and go back to the way that my life was because goals are hard. They take dedication, determination, time, energy, and so much more than we can give at times. 

God will always be there for us to pray and talk with along this journey. Seek the Holy Spirit's guidance, listen and pay attention. I feel that someone here on this earth can be that extra push and voice to help you get there. Or have multiple people help be that painful discipline push that you need for each of the goals you have set in your life. 

Pray and ask God to bring that person or people into your life. Make goals this year to better your relationship with God, get involved in missionary work, better your health, start that new career, mend bonds with ones that are broken, get out of debt, retire, and so much more. God will answer you and help you start this new year off right. Ask and then listen. 

God might send you an accountability partner that drives you crazy. He might send you someone who challenges you. Don’t be afraid, because that will be the one that sits with you at the end of this year when you two reflect on everything that you accomplished. 

Make bold goals this year, find the right accountability person, and stay close to God!  Doing these things can help you find success in your goals this year! 


Written by Sara Bankard

If you were to ask people my favorite word, they would say “blessed”. 
When I am responding on a day that I feel overwhelmed and someone asks me how I am doing, I always say, “All I can say is that I am blessed.” Most people who really know me can tell what kind of day I am truly having. I know that God has blessed me with so many things, and even though I am having a stressful day or going through a storm, I can still see God’s blessing all around me.

Isaiah 41:10
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

I even used to say, “Have a blessed day,” with extreme genuineness to customers or people who were rude and nasty to either me or some other person around me. Again, I was sincere, just wanting them to hopefully reflect on the way they treat people once they would walk away. I have had several come back and apologize to the person they upset or even me for the way they acted. I know that God is working through my words. We cannot let people get to us. We have to know that we are children of God, and He will take care of those who want to do harm to us.

When I am shopping in stores, most people end their greeting with, “Have a nice day,” but I am saying, “Have a blessed day.” I get this out before they even have the chance, and that is mainly because I worked retail for so long. I even get a smile at times once I say this, and they say it back to me.

Even when I used to work full time, I would try to help people who were struggling with the day. I would tell them that they can do only what they can and cannot control others, to know that I was there for them and together we would come up with a plan. This way it would benefit others and show them blessings that could come from working together as a team. I said “Blessed” a lot to the team.
 
I am always trying to teach my children about how blessed we are. We have been blessed with an amazing family that would do anything in the world for us. We have our food, home, clothes, and at prayer time they always say, “toys.” I am doing my best to teach them to look around for the beautiful things that God has created for us to see and resources to use.

The most important thing that I am teaching my girls this month is about God and Jesus. How He has blessed us with life and died for us. I think we all need this reminder each day about all the sacrifices Jesus made for us. How BLESSED we truly are because of Him.

I even have Blessed on my license plate with “In God We Trust” tags. That is how crazy I am about the word Blessed. See, I know that I am blessed.

The next time that you are having a bad day, going through pain, a storm, or even having a great day, reflect on how blessed you truly are. God wants us to give thanks for our blessings.

Written by Sara Bankard

I love living in Virginia. The city I live in is located in a valley that is nestled cozily between two
mountain ranges that protect the valley from some of the harshest weather. When I feel the
tug of the tides calling, I can jump in my car and stick my feet in the ocean sand in three hours’
time. Virginians enjoy four true seasons of weather—winter snow, spring rain, summer heat,
and autumn frost. Like a lot of people, autumn is my favorite season—pumpkin everything,
Friday night lights, the beauty of the changing leaves.

But just as God masterfully created this part of the world to change seasons, he also created
our lives to be lived within changing seasons. I’ve experienced seasons brimming over with
happiness—falling in love, gazing into the eyes of my newborn sons, traveling to different parts
of the world, laughing and loving amidst family and friends. I’ve also experienced seasons of
heartache and sadness—loved ones leaving, dreams dying, family and friendships floundering.

What no one prepared me for was this latest season I find myself in—a season of
waiting–waiting on the Lord to show me His will and plan. There is a restlessness in my soul
that I can’t overcome. I wake each morning and read the Bible, pray continually through the
day, pray with my children and study the Word as a family, volunteer my time and money to my
church and community. Yet nothing I do seems to fill this gaping hole I find within myself—this
feeling that something very important is missing.

I’m a planner. Life has taught me that the best way to feel control over a situation is to jump
into planning mode, much like my children love jumping into piles of leaves this time of year.
The sun shines brighter when I’m able to come up with a solution to a problem, map it out,
jump in, and follow it through to fruition. But what does one do when they can’t put their
finger on the pulse of the problem? God’s word tells us to wait; to endure patiently; to not give up hope.

“We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the
endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father”
(Colossians 1:11-12).

Paul tells us two things in this verse: Pray for God to strengthen us with his power to endure,
and to spend time thanking him so we may be filled with joy.

While I’m quick to pray for and with others, if I’m honest, how often do I ask others to
intercede on my behalf? Matthew 18:19-20 reminds us, “Again I say to you, if two of you agree
on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am among them.” It’s not always easy asking for help,
but the echoes of silent prayers may just be harder.

I’m also one of those gals who looks forward every year to November so I can be reminded to
celebrate everything I’m grateful for.  But what am I doing the other 334 days of the year?
Time spent focusing on what we don’t have doesn’t inspire appreciation or spark hope things
might change. Isaiah 40:31 promises, “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their
strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk
and not be faint.”

When life gets hard, hope in the Lord can be the only thing that sustains us. Because we are
incapable of sustaining ourselves, we need to actively affirm, with thanksgiving every day, that
it’s Jesus who can move mountains and open doors and fill the pits of impatience. We should
pray to the Holy Spirit, asking him to encourage our hearts and souls to celebrate the evidence
found in God’s word of his goodness. In Jesus is hope, strength, and abundance.

I’m not sure what lies ahead, but I know all is well with my soul as long as I stay close to Jesus,
praise him for who he is, and find the courage to ask a couple good friends to pray for me.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the
Holy Spirit you may abound in hope (Romans 15:13).